What Really is Self-Love?

Self Love Otter, Acrylic Paint on Rock

It can be challenging to recognize and embrace one’s positive qualities, especially in a society that celebrates achievement and perfection while harshly judging mistakes and flaws. People often get swept up in daily routines, working through weeks and months trying to meet deadlines and fulfill obligations, leaving little to no time for themselves. Sometimes we can view self-love as an act of selfishness. But self-love is not a pop culture craze; it’s a sustainable method of taking care of the self and creating stronger people.

So what does self-love mean? Well, it is best described as the act of embracing yourself, cherishing who you are, forgiving yourself as well as accepting the process. It’s a huge task to take responsibility for who we are, our achievements and the adversities we shall encounter in life. In this blog, we will highlight what self-love really is, why it is essential for us as individuals and how one can engage in the act of self-loving. 

What is Self-Love?

In art therapy, discussions around “self-love” frequently come up. It is a difficult concept for some to embrace. The saying, “You cannot love others unless you love yourself” often doesn’t make sense because people do love their family, friends and pets. Some think that it is being full of oneself or staring at their own reflection professing their love for themselves or tooting their own horn. I would like to redefine self-love as self-care, self-compassion and standing in one’s own truth.

Self-love is self-care. This is providing ourselves with mental, emotional and physical care that is restorative rather than depleting. There is overlap between all forms of body and mind self-care because we are a whole being, not one compartment. The leading cause of our need for more self-care is both emotional and physical stress. We cover all of these flows in-depth in our stress art how creativity heals and relieves stress. Advertisers would like us to believe that you have to spend money on self-care such as subscribing to Netflix, spa treatments or shopping. It is not like that at all and it is pretty simple. Some examples of self-care are:

• Taking time for quiet. Turn off the television, phone and radio. Create a quiet space for reflection and meditation.
• Journaling our feelings
• Connecting to friends and family for support
• Leaning into our emotions to understand them better
• Getting 7 to 8 hours of sleep every night
• Taking time for a daily walk
• Enjoying nature
• Practicing yoga or deep breathing
• Engaging in creative projects like sewing, writing, colouring, making art, playing music or cooking
• Eating regularly and staying hydrated
• Choosing healthy foods such as fruits and veggies
• Reaching out for help when you are struggling

Self-love is self-compassion. It is not thinking that you are perfect in every way. It is accepting that no one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. Self-love is recognizing when your inner critic gets too loud and turning down its volume. It is speaking to yourself kindly when you recognize you are suffering, and feel inadequate or imperfect. Through self-observation and recognition of one’s thoughts rather than denying them, people can recognize when they need more tender loving care.

Self-love is standing in your own truth. It is saying what you need. It is speaking up when things don’t feel right to you. It is not doing things that go against your principles. It is listening to your intuition and setting boundaries with others. It is being your authentic self.

Thus self-love is actually self-care, self-compassion and standing in your own truth. It is not looking at your reflection and saying adoring things. It is offering yourself the loving kindness that you would offer others. It is taking time out to care for yourself in ways that restore you rather than deplete you. It is standing in your authentic self and setting boundaries that respect your needs. Self-love is the key to optimal emotional health and happiness thus it is healthy to develop these self-love habits.

The Importance of Self-Love

So what’s the importance of self-love and why is it important to love yourself? It’s not just about feeling good about ourselves; it has a big impact on our mental and emotional health. Here are some reasons why self-love is key:

1. Improved Mental Health

Have you ever noticed how self-critical thoughts can weigh you down? Practicing self-love helps to combat anxiety, depression and stress. When you start to be kind to yourself you quiet that inner voice that tells you you’re not good enough. Instead of spiraling into negativity, you learn to feel your feelings and validate your experiences.

2. Better Relationships

When you love yourself you set a standard for how others should treat you. It becomes easier to set healthy boundaries and communicate your needs. Imagine being in relationships where you feel seen and heard; that’s the power of self-love. You become less dependent on others for validation and more able to form deep connections.

3. Resilience and Growth

Life throws curveballs at us such as job loss, breakups, and personal setbacks. Self-love is the safety net that allows you to bounce back. When you love yourself you see failures as opportunities to grow. You start to see challenges as chances to learn not as reflections of your inadequacy.

4. Healthier Lifestyle Choices

Self-love encourages individuals to prioritize their own well-being and needs. That’s when you will make choices knowing that you are worthy of care and attention, hence you should feed the body and soul. Regardless of whether it concerns choosing healthy food, doing exercises or merely watching a comedy these stimuli support the concepts of one’s worth of living a healthy and happy life.

Building Self-Love: Simple Habits for a Healthier You

Now that we are certain of what self-love entails and the essence of embracing it, how can self-love be incorporated into life? Here are some practical steps that can make a big difference:

1. Self Compassion

Think of how you would help a friend with some issues. In this case, chances are that you would speak words of comfort and reason. It is time now to direct that compassion within. If you make mistakes or encounter failures and frustrations wash them away with the same grace. Remind yourself that nobody is perfect, everyone can make mistakes, and that is all right.

2. Challenge Negative Self Talk

Be aware of the words that you use about yourself. Have you ever found that you negatively speak about yourself? If so it’s time to challenge those thoughts. Take some time to consider if you would like or want those words to hear themselves being said to a loved one. They should replace those harsh words with kind words. For instance instead of thinking that one is not good enough, try thinking that am doing my best and that is enough.

3. Set Healthy Boundaries

Are you guilty of agreeing to commitments that take the life right out of you? Learning how to say no for self, is often a part of self-love. I see nothing wrong in refusing to agree to things that are not good for you in one way or the other. It allows you to prioritize and feel as you manage your time and energy and feel empowered.

4. Engage in Self Care

This has nothing to do with pampering ourselves with a massage or a tasty dessert; it is about loving one’s self. Whether it’s sitting down with a book, going for a walk or doing something else, take your time to do interesting activities. Self-care should be seen as a way of having a party and imparting some positive energy into one’s life.

5. Reflect on Your Values and Goals

Take a few seconds here to consider what it is that you arguably truly care about in your life. What are your core values? What are your goals? Aligning your actions with your values not only helps with self-love but also helps you live authentically. When you act in line with your true self you create a happy life.

6. Seek Support

It is okay when self-love gets difficult, and at some point that will happen. If you are stuck please do not be ashamed to seek help. Share the information with a friend, join the relevant group or seek a professionals assistance. It also has its benefits when there is someone who you can correspond with and who will keep you going.

Wrapping It Up: Choosing Self-Love Every Day

People must find ways to love themselves so that they may lead happy lives. Self-acceptance is the basis for psychological well-being, interpersonal effective functioning and personal development. Self love therefore allows you to transform your self-images and gain a chance to live a happier life with heedless to others.

Life often pushes us to compare ourselves to others and neglect our own needs. This reflection serves as a reminder that self-love is not a destination but an ongoing journey. Take just one minute each day to think about how you can care for yourself; you’ve earned it. The world benefits from your presence, so why not treat yourself with the same love you give others? It’s time we realize that we deserve the same kindness we so freely offer to those around us, starting with ourselves. 

Get in touch with Art Therapy Guelph if you or someone you know is looking for an art therapist who is skilled in supporting people who may struggle with self-love, kindness and compassion. We also support people who experience anxiety, depression, grief, big life changes, trauma and PTSD. We offer group, one-on-one, and other therapeutic services in accordance with your convenience.