Shame and Trauma; Learn How Shame Dies When Stories Are Told
Trauma is a deeply distressing or disturbing experience that can have lasting emotional, psychological, and physical effects. It can be caused by a variety of events, such as abuse, accidents, natural disasters, or witnessing violence. Shame and trauma often leaves individuals feeling disconnected from themselves and others, and it can significantly impact their overall well-being.
Many trauma survivors feel a profound sense of shame because such experiences often lead them to internalize guilt or responsibility for what occurred. This self-blame, shame and trauma is a common, albeit unjustified, reaction to trauma. The victim may internalize messages told to them by their perpetrator. Recognizing that these feelings of shame are a normal response is crucial, but it is equally important to unpack and address these emotions. This process can significantly lessen the burden of shame and traumatic memories. When survivors begin to explore their trauma in a supportive environment, they can reframe their experiences, validate their feelings, and ultimately, alleviate the weight of shame that has hindered their healing journey.
When individuals share their stories of trauma in a safe and supportive environment, the shame and trauma associated with those experiences can begin to dissipate. Shame thrives in secrecy, but when stories are told, it loses its power. By voicing their experiences, individuals can start to reclaim their sense of worth and humanity. The act of storytelling allows them to see their experiences from a different perspective and to receive validation and empathy from others.
Brené Brown, a renowned researcher on shame, has extensively studied the impact of shame and vulnerability on human connection. She highlights several key points about shame:
- Shame cannot survive being spoken.
- Shame thrives on secrecy, silence, and judgment.
- Empathy and understanding are the antidotes to shame.
By addressing shame and trauma through open conversations and storytelling, individuals can begin to heal and build resilience.
Sharing one’s shame and trauma at a personal comfort level in a safe space is crucial for the healing process. It is essential that individuals feel in control of their narrative and decide how much they want to disclose. A safe space is an environment where individuals feel respected, heard, and supported without fear of judgment. This environment fosters trust and encourages individuals to take the necessary steps toward healing.
Trauma therapy can be instrumental in reducing shame and trauma when facilitated by the right therapist. A skilled therapist can create a compassionate and non-judgmental space where individuals can explore their trauma at their own pace. The therapist’s role is to guide and support the individual while respecting their boundaries and comfort levels. Through trauma therapy, individuals can gain insights into their experiences, develop coping strategies, and work towards emotional and psychological healing.
There are several types of therapy that can help with trauma, each offering unique benefits. Art therapy, for instance, allows individuals to express their feelings and experiences through creative means. This form of therapy can be particularly helpful for those who have difficulty verbalizing their trauma. Trauma counseling provides a structured environment where individuals can talk about their experiences with a trained professional who can offer guidance and support. Brainspotting is another effective method that helps individuals process trauma by accessing the brain’s natural healing mechanisms. This technique involves locating points in the client’s visual field that stimulate and release emotional distress. Art therapy helps with trauma experiences and shame by allowing individuals to express their feelings and experiences through creative means, providing a non-verbal outlet for emotions that may be difficult to articulate.
It is safe and okay to seek support from a therapist. A therapist is trained to work with individuals at their comfort levels, ensuring that the therapeutic process is both supportive and respectful. Therapy provides a space where individuals can explore their feelings and experiences without fear of judgment. The therapist’s role is to facilitate healing and to empower individuals to reclaim their lives.
In conclusion, trauma therapy and shame are intricately linked, and addressing one can significantly impact the other. By telling their stories in a safe and supportive environment, individuals can begin to dismantle the shame associated with their trauma. Various therapeutic approaches, such as art therapy, trauma counseling, and brainspotting, offer valuable tools for healing. It is essential to remember that seeking help from a therapist is a brave and important step towards recovery. With the right support, individuals can move beyond their trauma and towards a life of resilience and hope.
About the Author, Heather Caruso is a skilled, intuitive and empathic therapist. She is a registered psychotherapist, trauma counselor and art therapist. She sees clients online and in person in Guelph at Art Therapy Guelph.
If you are considering therapy to address your shame and trauma, Heather Caruso offers a free initial Zoom chat. This session allows you to explore whether her services align with your needs in a comfortable and judgment-free environment. It’s a valuable opportunity to discuss your concerns, ask questions, and determine if her approach feels right for you. Book Now.